Hey, I’m Right Here

Apparently, my wife thinks that I don’t exist just because she doesn’t see me ever. So, she feels as though she can talk about me right in front of everybody. Well, since a blog is our only form of communication, she should know that I’m writing the Great American Novel. (Well, maybe the great South American Novel. Although, I’m guessing Gabriel Garcia-Marquez did that. Or, was he Mexican?) But, I digress…

You know, this is just typical of marriage. The husband (most times, the man) has to do everything the wife wants. I have to support her in her blog and in her constant need for attention. (I think I know her birthday; I really do.) In the mean time, as soon as I want to play video games, walk around without pants, stink the house up with my horrendous odor, or write a novel, she just yells at me or tries to undermine my efforts. It’s almost like she doesn’t like my stink. How can that be?

So, gentlemen (usually, the husband), it’s up to you to remind your wives just how important you are. I’m calling a general strike! Stop taking out the trash. Don’t fix that light that only you can reach. And, by golly, increase your #2 production by at least double. And, don’t forget, if you like chili, don’t be afraid. Who’s going to stop you?

Alright, folks, I’m off to write. Don’t forget about me, and don’t let my wife badmouth me like she’s apt to do. Farewell for now.

Chris

Pee Pee Party

Well, our darling daughter has officially entered the party scene. She decided almost 2 weeks ago to start using the potty. Of course this is an exciting milestone and it has most definitely livened things up around here. But, I was planning on waiting a couple more months.

Now, about 6-8 times a day, I have to have a pee pee party, or a poopie party depending on what is appropriate. Yep, my daughter and I, and anyone else who happens to be occupying our home at that moment MUST drop everything, dance around like fools, singing pee pee in the potty each and every time she manages to make it without an accident.

When the process started, we were giving her rewards, either small toys or a special cookie or really just about anything. Quickly, she grew tired of those boring old rewards. But let me tell ya, this kid digs pee pee parties and poopie parties. She is a party girl. And I must say she is starting at a far younger age than her dear old mom and dad. Makes me wonder what the teen years will hold in store for us.

The Big D

I think my husband divorced me and no one filled me in. Well, at least we are apparently divorced in blog land. Finally, we find something we actually enjoy doing together, and he quits! It figures.

I'm not ready to give up on this blog yet, so you will be tortured with my sentiments until he comes crawling back. They always do, don't they?

He will tell you that I have continued to be very busy whoring him out to make some money for this family, and in fact that is not false. It's just that I enjoy being able to pay the bills each month, eventhough he tends to think it is overrated. I suppose that is because he is the one working hard for our money. We have a good system in this house, he makes it and I spend it. I see no flaws in this :)

At any rate, at least temporarily this has become a "single" woman's blog. I guess that means I can spend more time whining about him. Blog divorce (blivorce?) has its priveleges.

Enjoy your weekend!

Here at casa de craziness, we are about to embark on a long, but fun weekend. Of course, at this very second, my husband is sleeping soundly while I am the one trying to pack us up and get us ready to get out the door. Nice, huh?

The kid has NOT been sleeping well at all, for about 3 weeks, and I could definitely use just one night of uninterrupted sleep, nevermind a morning to sleep IN! I can only dream of me and my bed staying united past 7 am. That would be like hitting the lottery. It is particularly fun to hear the pitter patter of little feet at 7am after working until midnight, and hearing the screaming cries at 2am and 3am and 4am- well you get the picture.

Forget all that other stuff I said I would do if I won the lottery. Instead, I would sleep.
Alright, pity party over. I hope all of our one faithful reader (thanks Carrie!) have a great weekend.

Maybe you'll be lucky enough to get a taste of my hubby's blogging wit and charm when we return. That is, if I can get him out of bed.

I guess I'm not the only one...

Apparently my husband is a slacker too. This news is not as shocking to me as it may be to you. He doesn't blog when it is his turn, but truly that is just the beginning of his slackerness.

Hey, I kind of like that, slackerness sort of sounds like a royal title. His slackerness. Now that is something to be proud of. I guess this means I am proud of him! Isn't that an extra special way to turn a negative into a positive? All those child rearing tips have paid off in my marriage. What does that tell you?

Now back to your regularly scheduled programming. This one may be off the air for a few days as we continue to be pulled in 12 different directions.

Slacker

Yep, that's me, I'm a slacker! It has been my turn to blog for quite a few days and I haven't been able to find the time or energy to do it. Why you ask? Because I am lazy. Plain and simple, I'm lazy.
Yes, I run myself ragged chasing after my 2.5 year old, but that is a mere excuse. I clearly don't run fast enough because well, my butt is rather large. The only reasonable explanation is that I am lazy.
Nothing to inightful for this blog. I guess that is a good thing. It means my husband isn't making me too crazy, and the kid has been sleeping at night. I am a woman of simple tastes. These two things make me happier than anything else, aside from winning the lottery. That would make me happy. Oh so happy.
What would I do with a million bucks? After giving half to uncle Sam YIPPPEEE. We would buy a "forever" house, nothing extravagant, just bigger than a shoebox. We would pay off debt. Give our families a little bit and go on a vacation. That would take care of it. And I suppose that a million may not even be enough. Sigh...sad isn't it?
What would you do if you were gifted or won a million bucks? Do tell. Inquiring minds want to know.